Love in Action
The Venerable Joan Clark
1 John 3:16-24
Love one another. It sounds so simple, doesn't it? Of course, if you've ever really tried it, you know that this love stuff is incredibly hard. I guess that's why Jesus made such a big deal out of it, because he knows how hard it is for us. Love one another. It's his big commandment. In the gospel of John, we hear Jesus saying it in as many ways as he possibly can. But he does more than just say it. He also shows it.
In today's gospel passage, Jesus teaches his disciples about the good shepherd, saying quite plainly that he is the good shepherd who lays down his life for his sheep. Now, the people who first heard Jesus say these words may have thought he was speaking metaphorically about actually laying down his life. But after the cross, they realized that he meant it literally. He is the shepherd who gave his life for his sheep.
This is also the way our passage from 1 John begins today. "We know love by this, that he laid down his life for us" (3:16a). As followers of Jesus, we who are committed to go where Jesus went and do what Jesus did, ought to lay down our lives for one another, too. Then John does something unusual in his letter here. He gets specific. He offers a concrete example of how we can practice this, how we can lay down our lives for one another. "How does God's love abide in anyone who has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses to help?" (3:17). I really wish he hadn't asked that question, don't you? John tells us to put our love where our mouth is. "My dear children," John writes, "let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love."
We need to look a little closer at that very blunt question that John poses: "How does God's love abide in anyone who has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses to help?" Now, we'll all be quick to offer up examples of ways that we help people in need: We give items to help homeless families, we bring groceries to stock a local food pantry, we collect money for victims of natural disasters. There are lots of things we could list. But I hope we don't think that lets us off the hook so we can just pat ourselves on the back for doing our part and move on with our lives.
Once when my children were little, I had taken them to Caroline Bay and on the way passed by some people who were sitting beside the road, and I made the comment that there were a lot of poor people living in town. Apparently, this left an impression on my son, who was in about the Standard 1 at the time. When we got back home after our trip, I saw him counting the money he had saved in his piggy bank. He had about thirty dollars. I asked him what he was going to do with all that money, and he told me he wanted to give it to the poor people in Timaru. Then, before I even thought about what I was saying, I blurted out, "Oh, you're not going to give it all to the poor people, are you? Don't you want to spend some of it on yourself?" After I said the words, I was so ashamed of myself. But it was honestly the way I felt. It seems that when it comes to giving to the poor, we have this little internal monitor that we aren't even aware of. That monitor allows us to give just as much as we need to in order to feel okay about ourselves, but not so much that it affects our desire to first take care of ourselves in the way we think we deserve it.
After our Harvest Thanks giving Sunday last week and the small amount of goods that come in, I've been reflecting on the way we respond to the poor here in Ashburton and wondering if it's done in a loving way or a judging way. Loving and judging are opposites. If you're loving someone, it means you're not judging them. And if you're judging someone, it means you're not loving them. When we give to the poor, are we giving in love? Or are we giving in judgment?
have come to the conclusion that deep down inside, most of us pass judgment on the poor. We may want to help them, and we may feel compassion for them. But there is a part of us that believes they are poor because of something they did. Their poverty is a consequence of the way they have lived their lives.
When we give to the poor, we often give the stuff that we don't want. If you've ever sorted through clothing that people have given to the poor, it's amazing how many pieces of clothing have little price stickers on them. By that I don't mean price stickers from clothing stores, I mean the kind of homemade price stickers you use for garage sales. People try to sell their used clothing at a garage sale first and then if nobody else wants it, rather than just throw it out, they'll give the clothing to the poor. It's assumed that if someone is poor, they should be grateful for anything they're given. After all, it's not as if they worked for it, like we have. The really nice stuff is for those who have earned it.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu says that when we give to the poor, we should give as if we were giving to our own family. Would you want someone from your own family to wear clothing that has been rescued from the trash bin? Would you send your children to school in those clothes? Of course, we can also look at the passage in Matthew that tells us whatever we do to help people in need we're doing for Jesus. It's been suggested that we label collection bins for the poor, "Junk for Jesus." That's usually what we give.
Even when there is a face to the poor, when someone asks us directly for our help, the judging part of us is always making an assessment. We want to give to the one who is telling us the truth. We want to give to the one who will make the best use of what we're offering. We want to give to the one who will appreciate it. We don't want anyone to take advantage of us.
What about the story where there were ten lepers who came to Jesus for healing? Only one returned to give thanks. I would imagine that people took advantage of Jesus all the time. They came to him for help, but their motivation wasn't always pure. If that story is any indication, we might conclude that nine out of ten times Jesus helped people who were just using him. People in need are selfish and sinful just as we all are. But it didn't seem to matter to Jesus.
We worship a God of grace. He loves us unconditionally; even though we can do absolutely nothing to earn such a gift, he gives us his love freely, with no strings attached. It's a challenge for us to love like that and a growing edge for all of us.
There's a marvellous story about Robert De Vincenzo, the famous golfer from Argentina.
Once when he won a tournament, he received his check and posed for pictures. He did all the things the victor does after a golf tournament. Then as he was walking alone to his car in the parking lot, he was approached by a young woman. The woman congratulated him on his win and proceeded to tell him about her child, who was seriously ill and near death. She didn't know how she was going to pay the doctor's bills and hospital expenses.
De Vincenzo was deeply moved by her story, so he took out a pen and endorsed his winning check for payment to the woman. He handed her the check and told her to make some good days for the baby.
The next week as De Vincenzo was out having lunch a Professional Golf Association official stopped by his table. "Some of the boys in the parking lot last week told me you met a young woman there after you won that tournament." De Vincenzo nodded.
The official felt he should know the truth and reported, "I have news for you. She's a phony. She has no sick baby. She's not even married. She fleeced you, my friend."
"You mean there is no baby who is dying?" asked De Vincenzo.
"That's right," said the official.
De Vincenzo replied, "That's the best news I've heard all week."
We know that we can't give money to everyone who asks us. We also know that giving people money isn't always helpful. Sometimes the loving response is to help people help themselves. But the question John poses should cause us to examine our own consciences when it comes to the way we interact with people who need our help. Are we loving them or judging them?
When I think of a person who exemplified this passage about putting love into action by helping those in need, I immediately think of Mother Teresa. She got the connection between loving and judging and said quite simply, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them." She also had a lot to say about the way we can truly care for those in need. Her mission was not to give people material stuff but to give them love, recognizing the most terrible poverty of all is loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted.
I find all of this very challenging to me personally because I believe a growing edge for me as a Christian is in loving not judging. I suspect I may not be the only one. We could all become better at loving not judging. I have faith that we can help one another do that.
We all want our congregation to grow. But while we might immediately associate growth with more people in our pews or more programs for the community, the most important way we can grow is in loving. To quote Mother Teresa one last time this morning, she said that what's significant in our ministry is not "how much we do, but how much love we put in the action." We will make a difference in the world around us, not as we grow in doing more, but as we grow in loving more.
John tells us that all of this is important so that we can stand before God with a clear conscience. After all, when someone we love asks us to do something for them again and again and we ignore them, it's pretty hard to be in their presence, isn't it? I wonder if that's why so many people seem to spend their lives running from God.
"And this is his commandment, that we should believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he commanded us. All who obey his commandments abide in him, and he abides in them" (1 John 3:23-24a).
Amen.